On this cold Monday evening, I am curled up on a couch in my house, my feet despite being covered in a blanket are pretty cold, a sign that I should probably be heading to bed. It’s past my bed time anyway, and tomorrow (that happens to be today for you) is a working day! A movie is playing on TV but I have zero interest in it. I can barely tell you what it is about. This has become a routine; my ability to zone out into my own space, oblivious of my surrounding. A coping mechanism, I guess.
Where have I been? Why have I not been posting regularly?
When I started this little space, I promised to make it my ‘safe’ place. My go to honest spot. I decided that I would write from the bottom of my heart and not present a superficial version of myself; or hide how I was feeling just to stay interesting or to fit in. if someone was going to read what I put up here, I would strive to make it as true and as authentic as possible. And that has not changed.
Now that we are being honest, I’ve been going through one of those rough patches. No, nobody died (God forbid) and I am all healthy. But in the last one month or so, I have experienced all the emotions one can go through, and in great detail. I have laughed, genuinely; cried, often and from the bottom of my heart, made merry and even occasionally withdrawn into my little cocoon.
I am a planner in nature. And in as much as I do not start my year with a list of resolutions, there are things that I set out to achieve from time to time. Quite frankly, this hasn’t quite gone according to plan and as you can imagine it got to me. I’m only human. For those with unreplied messages and cancelled plans from me, please bear with me? A wise person once said that only a fool will do the same thing over and over and expect different results. Also, throwing in the towel is not a lucrative option. It’s time to change the formula, time to try a different approach in how I’ve been doing things; time to remap.
It’s interesting, how most people will walk around looking well put together but fighting different battles within and around them. You are doing great honey, press on! Keep your head held high. Break down if you must, but always bounce back. And you know what, today, if all you do/did was keep yourself together, you did great! Be proud of yourself, and try again tomorrow. Never be afraid to start all over again.
Don’t get me wrong, I am grateful for the gift of life and every wonderful thing that God has placed in it. I just happen to believe that there is more to life. There is a greater purpose in store for all of us. And from time to time, while still in pursuit of this purpose, we stumble. it’s at that point that we need to take some time, make some changes, retrace our steps and get back on track.
I’m taking time to get viagra pas cher my mojo back; I’m remapping. 🙂